wish i spoke purplese,
then i'd know what that color is trying to say to me,
in the beginning was the light
and the light was many colors,
there was sensation, there was pain,
the act of movement wasn't easy--
you've been there in your dreams,
god woke up from infinity one moment
and then all This began,

i wish i knew acheint,
then i'd know what my heart is trying to tell me,
in the beginning was the fear
and the fear was without reason,
there was beauty, there was art,
there were already finished jokes so crazy,
god woke up to find itself
in the middle of the Plan,

i wish i understood infinitese,
then i'd know what the horizion was trying to call me,
in the beginning was the word,
and in the word were many meanings,
there was blinking flashing signs,
there were arrows, there were buttons,
god woke up to find again
it was happening right NOW.

_God is a Question

when i destroy the universe
i will take your sour toast
to the paralyzed tree

when i destroy the universe
i will take your sour toast
to the paralyzed tree

smile pretty for the atom bombs
smile pretty little one
smile pretty for the atom bombs
smile pretty little one

you might go to hell for
being rude to the doorman
at the gates of heaven

you might to hell for
being rude to the doorman
at the gates of heaven

put on your best shoes,
polish up,
put on your best shoes,
polish up,

waving flags with pretty colors
will save your soul from
satan candy

waving flags with pretty colors
will save your soul from
satan candy

wait for the force wave to hit,
my pretty one,
smile for all the atom bombs,
my pretty one.

smile pretty for the atom bombs,
smile pretty little one
say thank you jesus

fast-heartbeatingly amazed
at all the flavors of pain--
a certain sorrow tastes like peaches,
you discover that everything you are
vibrates in lightdance upon
a mirror held too close to the soul,
shame feels like red,

those formulas aren't working anymore,

ache-pausingly eternal
while taking this one blink--
the light and dark cause it all onscreen,
you intuit that everything you want
waits upon a shelf beside
the paper zoetrope,
how many Nows in a moment...

that feeling isn't going anywhere.

I want to blow your mind
in a thousand ways
but somehow i never learned how,
all i ever gained
was the ability to be me,

Songs sprinkle the sky
across a million years
but the unsung things are secret,
all we ever gain by hiding
is self-defeat,

I want to kill myself sometimes
doesn't matter how
but i think this happens to everyone,
and if it doesn't
i'm happy for you,

It's not easy to live the life i lead
whether choosing or chosen
but every day i stumble thru,
i guess sometimes
i may knock things over,

If i could give you all i had
you know for sure i would
but there's some things never asked for,
and in response some things
never become,

I see you falling thru this distance beside me,
just over there,
but you don't seem to notice me so much,
all we ever gain in life
is contact,

with something,
with someone,
with ourselves,

whatever and ever amen.

Religion... is the most evil trick ever perpretrated on Mankind.

Not spirituality or god... note, i didn't say that. But religion.

The existance or non-existance and the meaning or non-meaning of such
existance or non-existance of such things as "spirit" and "god" can be debated
back and forth, and much can come of it no matter which "side" you are on.

But with Religion, it DOES exist. We can say that. And it does DO things.
And those things can be judged if you wish to to have a quality. And many would
speak of the peace which comes from it... but again, i say, cast your Eye upon
"god" and "spirituality" and ask if the peace does not truly come from THAT,
and if so... what need religion?

The quality of the work of religion, and as to my lower statements, about the
ENEMY, no... not even "religion" is a proper term for said enemy, even that is
not simple enough, it is beyond that, religion is merely their Tool. But the quality
of work of religion, if seen... must truly be quantified as "Evil" if anything evil
is.

Religion is a spider, always has been. And together with Polotics... that double-fisted
attack, Mankind has been imprisoned since it's birth. Ever caught in a well-designed
web, like those people in the move the Matrix who don't realize their world isn't
real, in a way you can feel sorry for them... but the truth is that we are them in most
cases.

Right now there are very FEW, but we are growing. These EYES, opened, and
SEEING things as they are, past the illusion of "mara", past the questions of
afterlife and into THIS life... and we are AWAKENING to a new Way.

It will come. You cannot stop it. Your age is dying. A beheaded snake, twisting
with the contortions of its' death throes. I AM here to witness the beginning of
your Fall.

I, lucifer, the bright eye... and we SEE, some of us, oh yes we do. And the more
we understand about what we see, the more nails are added to your coffin. You
cannot stop it, you can only hope to slow it down. You are already defeated,
O' ENEMY... even tho' some of your greatest tricks still scour the face of the Earth,
doing what damage it can.

Flames,
Individual fragments of fire,
jumping, dancing, higher,
living and dying in moments,
consuming,
and consumed away,

Memories,
On crumpled up pieces of paper,
burning, blackened, vapour,
transferred from present to past,
fleeting,
and farther each day.

When i was born,
i held the knowledge of the Universe inside my head,
and now with every thought i have
i get a little dumber
and a little dead.

___Horus, Odin, Cyclops, Oracle

I am unconquerable,
because the only way to conquer me
is to love me,
that impossible task,

I am unquenchable,
because the only way to put me out
is to kill me,
and i'm not dead yet,

I am unfathomable,
because the only way to know me
is to understand,
that bottomless pit,

I become immovable,
because the only way to move me
is to pull me with beauty,
and i am becoming blind

___Half-God

fill in the blank before the phrase
'that's what broken hearts are for',
this life of mine only gives me things
to teach me about the concept of loss,
honey drips from my mind and i
let it fall into the dirt,
i put effort into myself
because i'm just trying to pay the cost,
who owns you?

fill up the cup that's for elijah
'that's what silly dreams are for',
this eye of mine only tells me things
to help me see i am all alone,
song flyes from my heart and i
do not care where it goes,
i purchased the right to know myself,
what did you purchase the right to know?
who owns you?

Call it what you will,
your mind is your own,
don't toss blame at me
for things you cannot buy,
[bad word removed] for nation's sake,
you might as well,
carry dog-tired pages
bible baby belle,

Take this as it comes,
your heart is not your own,
don't quote verse at me
you haven't lived it yet,
Suck for pity's sake,
your youth goes down the well,
learn to look and see
me as i compel

the world to to the Aesthetical boogie.

Win a little bit,
and then you lose your soul,
don't you play that way,
you just wait your turn,
Fist of all the ash
of what you never were,
masks reveal the plan
and you were never her,

Fake a pretty smile
then throw frown right on cue,
don't you think i know
the places that you dream,
Kissed away the truth
inside a soul unstirred,
miss the way that you
fail to reoccur

when the world begins the Aesthetical boogie.

how is it that i have failed you so badly,
when i never even knew you were there?
if you call yourself my equal... that's a high plataue to stand on,
i'm lost in this chase and i'm lost in this world,
if there was any purpose for our being here... i've forgotten it,
if you remember it-- would you please tell me,
be merciful,
what's this all about?
i'm twisting in the wind and i'm laughing as i fly,
and we all must hit the ground some day,
what's the meaning of the flight
what's the direction to fly in?
is there a purpose to this feeling and this eye.

one time not long ago,
i downloaded my own soul,
and now it's broken and buried,
and i am just a role
i play so aimless,

so angry at all this nothing,
angry at all this super sky,
wouldn't mind being down all the time,
if it weren't for the onlookers,

wouldn't mind being down here
if it weren't for the people who'll never understand,

i want to get deeper into this curse i'm under,
so godamned exhausted,
only have the energy to use you,
or if you want you can use me,
don't have the energy to care...
that's a lie.

one moment i am ascending,
next i'm plunging toward it,
the defiled and forgotten
inside a crazy dream
i dream so angry,

so worn from all this standing,
worn from all this dancing down below,
wouldn't mind the screaming and crying
if it weren't for the repercussions,

wouldn't mind just giving up
if it weren't for all the bastards who just don't get it,

i want to go deeper into this curse i'm under
so godamned sick of it all,
only have the heart to drown in,
or you can drown me in yours,
don't have the energy to care...
i wonder...
if that's a lie.

I just stumbled upon this blog. All about Pumkin-inspired art? Nice.

and just so you know, dear buddha,
i'm not trying to pull myself together,
just tryin' to finally fall apart,

let all the cares rush past like iceburghs--
in the distance,
don't think i'll miss them,

want to take a chance to risk this slight all,
find my back up against the world-wall,
where in the spotlight of the very nervous
i can penetrate right thru them
in a watch-out-now glare,
and see they're not there,

never were there,

and if you care to follow along my children,
notice i'm not getting better
i'm just flying higher,

take all the moments like unknown pink pills--
no prescription,
won't try to miss them,

going to step off of this shaking tower
for sake of falling, not sake of power,
where in the descent to the ocean below
i can be laughing,
i can be laughing out there,

i can be laughing out there,

i can be laughing out there.

I learned to play Cherub Rock yesterday!!! I don't have any poetry but I have that it took 3 days to figure out that song hahahah.