~~~~~~~~~~~******a little message from me, to the pumpkins...******~~~~~~~~~~

Please visit Anchorage, Alaska and play in the Sullivian arena! (or some other under-18 venue) I'm under 18 but I want to see you.. and I bet you would love alaska! ANCHORAGE!!! ANCHORAGE!!! i love you pumpkins
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I have always been a strange child...


I'm only 13 years old right now. All of my friends at school listen to the same music, wear the same clothes, and are those middle schoolers that we all think of now. I'm a freak and I know it, and the Pumpkins' music has helped me realize that... My friends make fun of me for it, but it doesn't bother me, because even when my oldest friends let me down, my music never does.

I found Billy Corgan/TSP "officially" in about summer 2005. It sounds late to you, but I was only 10. I heard the Zwan song "Settle Down" and fell in love with it... especially the end, where billy sings "la-di-dah, la-di-dah, ladidah ladidah, la-di-dah, la-di-dah!" with that amazing guitar solo!!! when heard that I knew I had to hear more. So that summer I listened to Zwan constantly.I was a loner all thru 4th and 5th grade, and because of this, I am even closer to my music. in 2006 fell in love with the Pumpkins. I entered 6th grade that fall and realized I was a huge nerd. Kinda emo too. not in a good way. By the end of 6th grade I started to become more "normal" and fit in at least.. a little.

I've been playing guitar since 5th grade, and it really all started with SP. I basically learned by teaching myself their songs. I'm getting much better now.

During 7th grade, I thought I was just as happy as ever. and i was. Until January. my oldest friend, sage, had turned on me again and gotten a new "best friend". It's happened before, nearly every year since 1st grade. but this time she went too far... she said she would hang out with me after school one day. Kirsten and i went to call my mom and we found sage, zaide (her new best friend) and maiji (a new girl who hates me for no particular reason). I was pissed off. it happened many times for the next 4 months. Sadly enough, i got used to being hurt like that. But then it got worse.

in late april I started to get closer to my friend Kirsten, and we talked about our frustrations with other people, life, music, whatever came up. Soon our other friends started acting weird and were asking me what was going on. i didn't really know, so I asked kirsten, and in mid-may, she wrote me an email saying we were all immature and i should just get over myself. soon after she moved to a different table at lunch and started being very mean to me. that email still makes me upset. now she's friends again with most of our old friends, and everyone asks me why I won't apoligize. I didn't do anything that i need to apoligize for. i honestly don't know what I'm supposed to do.. but my music has helped me get thru that 2 months of torture.

there's many reasons why i've depended on my music in the past, and without the pumpkins I would be miserable.

Now i'm going into 8th grade. I'm still changing, but I've mostly found myself. My friends are just now going thru their "tough phases," so I've been acting a little antisocial lately. Billy's music helped me get thru the tougher times when I don't know where i am pr who i am and I thank him for that.


I saw the Pumpkins perform in Portland, Oregon on September 21st 2007... it was wonderful. I was in shock that I was even in the same room as billy. I could go on and on about it. now i'm EVEN MORE of a devoted fan to the Pumpkins. YESSS

So, I'd like to say, thank you so much to all the pumpkins who have ever been Pumpkins - you have all inspired me, every single one. I was creative, but I didn't know what to do with it, and full of angst, and this band helped me work thru it all.

all that I ask from you now is to keep making music, stay happy... AND COME TO ANCHORAGE, ALASKA!!!! Alaska needs more good music like you guys I love you!

-innosense (aka tessa)