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Oct 12, 2008
COMMENTS
Who am i?
April 28, 2008, 8:56 pm - Fabiness
Iīm the Director of my own online business, Elflandīs Workshop. ( google it )
Artist, Photographer, Nature lover, and i love music almost more than anything in the world. I have a daughter named Luna and i love her even more than music.
I spend my days working my ass off behind the computerīs screen, writing, drawing and playing bass guitar, dreaming that one day i will play in a band. I already turned 29 but i guess i still got a chance or two.
Iīm stuck in Costa Rica, iīm glad we have no army here, we are peaceful people but itīs a bit too hard for artists down here so i get a bit disappointed sometimes and tired...and leaves me wishing for something better.
I enjoy books and poetry but specially music, i live with 8 cats i love and take care of, iīm basically normal.... nah...... I īm a dreamer.
My basic philosophy of life here, it changes here and there constantly, but at the end this sums it all up. We will see in ten or 20 years: BEWARE itīs a loooooooooong text.
Destiny or not destiny, the idea makes me feel i am in the right place in the right moment no matter if i'm in a very bad situation. but i do believe i can decide what to do next. I know i have to get through life experiences, it's supposed to happen because i chose this before i was born, i also feel i can change my own destiny if i really want to and that is ok too, because no matter how many mistakes or how far away i get form the original purpose and i suffer for it, i know i will always learn something that will help my soul evolve and become more compassionate and not be so materially attached and i will also add a stamp into someone elseīs soul, even if itīs just for a split second.
I see life as a progress where we must solve things, issues, problems, situations, learn and compare, experiment, let go and come back again from where we came, we are one, not separate and the best way to know it all is to be many beings experimenting and walking all the paths at the same time and coming back with all the information of good and evil, sorrow and happiness, anguish and pure joy, love and hate, but i also think the nature of our pure being is good, is light and sound and ecstasy, the moment we see it all, from all the points of view, we go back and remain being humble and pure. How do you know you are happy if you have always being happy? So i think we come here to learn, we chose who, when and where and with who, we do our things, it's all planned like a play, we pretend being something or someone and while we are acting we tend to forget who we really are because we get really deep in our roles, but then, you hear some claps and gasps and laughs and then you realize it was all in your head, you are not that character, you were feeling all of it, but you are not that character, is only a play....we become better and better at this acting, we switch easily every life we choose, until we are so skilled that we don't need to make an effort anymore to be all the characters you want, you understand them all, you can be all of them just by wishing it, you are everyone and everyone is you, we are ONE.
So destiny, it makes all seem controlled, and i believe that in a way, a very cosmic way it is all controlled somehow, with some rules or alternative doors or paths, so we can always choose between certain boundaries and i feel we know what we need. See it like this, a vast ocean, you pick up a drop and put it in a jar, is the drop just a drop because it was separated from the bigger source? or is it still the ocean?
I donīt feel separated at all. But i can tell you that sometimes i feel the world is so ridiculously cruel i cannot take it any more, but i just breathe in and out and contemplate the whole and i think itīs beautiful somehow. Beauty, love, compassion, patience.... not so easy to comprehend purely, but iīm trying to. Life is so short and so much to think about, see, hear, feel, change, fix, destroy.
I hope someone feels connected with me somewhere in this little bubble floating in space before it burst, i have it all but yet feel lonely but i know iīm not, i just wish with a very human-like sense of desire and wanting that someday all the love and care i have to share finds the one who will appreciate it and treasure it forever. Perhaps iīm asking too much when i know iīm surrounded by people who love me, itīs just thereīs something odd about it all, thereīs something missing and i cannot seem to find it just yet, thereīs an emptiness in my heart and i just donīt know quite sure what this is.
Hmmmmm what else, letīs see....
Favorite Books:
The King of Elflandīs Daughter, Lord of the Rings, Dragon World, Dragonlance Chronicles, My life with the Lama, The Little Prince, The Vampire Chronicles, John Livingston Seagull, Illusions.History Books and encyclopedias.
i liked the Secret for more reasons i thought. The Bible as the best fictional book with the best moral lesson, no offense here please.
Writers:
Poe, Lovecraft, Richard Bach, Neil Gaiman, Anne Rice, Tolkien, Napoleon Hill, 'Namo Ching Hai Wu Shang Shih.
Movies: The Fountain, Dark Crystal, Legend, Labyrinth, LOTR, Trainspotting, Requiem for a Dream, PI, Amelie, Conan, some old School Anime. The City of Lost Children, I love Horror movies, but horror movies with some class please, pure gore like SAW is out of my list.
Music: ah well.....iīm a very open person in this field.
Smashing Pumpkins, The Cure, Siouxie and the Banshees, Radiohead, Portishead, Cocteau Twins, Bauhaus, Muse, Nine Inch Nails, The Who, Skinny Puppy, KMFDM, Bjork, Sigur Ros, P.J Harvey, David Bowie, Ministry, Peter Gabriel, Tool, A Perfect Circle, Jethro Tull, Led Zeppelin, Doors, Police, Alan Parsonīs Project, YES, U2, Moody Blues, Coldplay, Richard Ashcroft, Bob Dylan, Black Sabbat, Orbital, BT, Carmen Rizzio, VAS, Niyaz, Dead Can Dance, Omnia, Faun, Enya, Beethoven, Mozart, and random 80īs pop music, i liked Heart a lot. BARRACUDA!
I do play Videogames yes. Silent Hill, Resident Evil, and old school games like Metroid, Castlevania, Gradius, Lords of Thunder, Metal Gear, Ice Wind Dale, Baldurs Gate, Star Fox, CONTRA! Bwuahaha and fighting games....but itīs been a while since i played something i like.
Religion: i still donīt know i donīt really believe in religions at all but iīm a very spiritual person. I take Yoga seriously, meditation but i also go around making weird stuff with flowers and bones and sticks or hug trees or sometimes i pray to Mary, and think about pretty things and wish everyone the best, i respect peopleīs choices but i do not support violence in any form unless you get violent with Rock and Roll YEAH!
No Drugs for me, i donīt drink, used to smoke pot to relax, it was kinda fun, but that is in the past. Music is my drug. I donīt eat cadavers of animals, but sometimes i give it a bite just for the taste but get sick most of the times.
I simply looooooooove food, I love food! yum!
About my past:
A few relationships, a couple very serious.
I married my best friend. I broke a couple of hearts and mine was broken since i have memory. Only girl in a band of kids, cousins, brothers and i was the youngest so i had to fight for a place, kick, bite, scream, crawl, claw, run, hide. I used to play with cars, wooden swords, climbed trees, had a few barbie dolls i later hated for being so skinny and ride my bicycle until someone stole it. and i loved to spend the vacations swimming in the little swimming pool my parents made, from 7 am to 6 pm nonstop. Used to go watch my mom fly with a hang glider and watch my dad play bass and saxophone and get sad because he had a few bands and then got frustrated when he had to stop the music and get a job. Then they had a terrible divorce and my dad tormented us until i was about 18-19 years old. Now he is cool and old. Mom is an artist.
yes iīm VERY into fantasy, iīm a sensible person. i love rain and sad songs and i made some calculations and i think iīve listened to Billy Corganīs To Love Somebody more than a thousand times this month. Iīm obssssesseddddddddd with music.
Tah Daaaaah!
this was a pre 30īs crisis or something....
Artist, Photographer, Nature lover, and i love music almost more than anything in the world. I have a daughter named Luna and i love her even more than music.
I spend my days working my ass off behind the computerīs screen, writing, drawing and playing bass guitar, dreaming that one day i will play in a band. I already turned 29 but i guess i still got a chance or two.
Iīm stuck in Costa Rica, iīm glad we have no army here, we are peaceful people but itīs a bit too hard for artists down here so i get a bit disappointed sometimes and tired...and leaves me wishing for something better.
I enjoy books and poetry but specially music, i live with 8 cats i love and take care of, iīm basically normal.... nah...... I īm a dreamer.
My basic philosophy of life here, it changes here and there constantly, but at the end this sums it all up. We will see in ten or 20 years: BEWARE itīs a loooooooooong text.
Destiny or not destiny, the idea makes me feel i am in the right place in the right moment no matter if i'm in a very bad situation. but i do believe i can decide what to do next. I know i have to get through life experiences, it's supposed to happen because i chose this before i was born, i also feel i can change my own destiny if i really want to and that is ok too, because no matter how many mistakes or how far away i get form the original purpose and i suffer for it, i know i will always learn something that will help my soul evolve and become more compassionate and not be so materially attached and i will also add a stamp into someone elseīs soul, even if itīs just for a split second.
I see life as a progress where we must solve things, issues, problems, situations, learn and compare, experiment, let go and come back again from where we came, we are one, not separate and the best way to know it all is to be many beings experimenting and walking all the paths at the same time and coming back with all the information of good and evil, sorrow and happiness, anguish and pure joy, love and hate, but i also think the nature of our pure being is good, is light and sound and ecstasy, the moment we see it all, from all the points of view, we go back and remain being humble and pure. How do you know you are happy if you have always being happy? So i think we come here to learn, we chose who, when and where and with who, we do our things, it's all planned like a play, we pretend being something or someone and while we are acting we tend to forget who we really are because we get really deep in our roles, but then, you hear some claps and gasps and laughs and then you realize it was all in your head, you are not that character, you were feeling all of it, but you are not that character, is only a play....we become better and better at this acting, we switch easily every life we choose, until we are so skilled that we don't need to make an effort anymore to be all the characters you want, you understand them all, you can be all of them just by wishing it, you are everyone and everyone is you, we are ONE.
So destiny, it makes all seem controlled, and i believe that in a way, a very cosmic way it is all controlled somehow, with some rules or alternative doors or paths, so we can always choose between certain boundaries and i feel we know what we need. See it like this, a vast ocean, you pick up a drop and put it in a jar, is the drop just a drop because it was separated from the bigger source? or is it still the ocean?
I donīt feel separated at all. But i can tell you that sometimes i feel the world is so ridiculously cruel i cannot take it any more, but i just breathe in and out and contemplate the whole and i think itīs beautiful somehow. Beauty, love, compassion, patience.... not so easy to comprehend purely, but iīm trying to. Life is so short and so much to think about, see, hear, feel, change, fix, destroy.
I hope someone feels connected with me somewhere in this little bubble floating in space before it burst, i have it all but yet feel lonely but i know iīm not, i just wish with a very human-like sense of desire and wanting that someday all the love and care i have to share finds the one who will appreciate it and treasure it forever. Perhaps iīm asking too much when i know iīm surrounded by people who love me, itīs just thereīs something odd about it all, thereīs something missing and i cannot seem to find it just yet, thereīs an emptiness in my heart and i just donīt know quite sure what this is.
Hmmmmm what else, letīs see....
Favorite Books:
The King of Elflandīs Daughter, Lord of the Rings, Dragon World, Dragonlance Chronicles, My life with the Lama, The Little Prince, The Vampire Chronicles, John Livingston Seagull, Illusions.History Books and encyclopedias.
i liked the Secret for more reasons i thought. The Bible as the best fictional book with the best moral lesson, no offense here please.
Writers:
Poe, Lovecraft, Richard Bach, Neil Gaiman, Anne Rice, Tolkien, Napoleon Hill, 'Namo Ching Hai Wu Shang Shih.
Movies: The Fountain, Dark Crystal, Legend, Labyrinth, LOTR, Trainspotting, Requiem for a Dream, PI, Amelie, Conan, some old School Anime. The City of Lost Children, I love Horror movies, but horror movies with some class please, pure gore like SAW is out of my list.
Music: ah well.....iīm a very open person in this field.
Smashing Pumpkins, The Cure, Siouxie and the Banshees, Radiohead, Portishead, Cocteau Twins, Bauhaus, Muse, Nine Inch Nails, The Who, Skinny Puppy, KMFDM, Bjork, Sigur Ros, P.J Harvey, David Bowie, Ministry, Peter Gabriel, Tool, A Perfect Circle, Jethro Tull, Led Zeppelin, Doors, Police, Alan Parsonīs Project, YES, U2, Moody Blues, Coldplay, Richard Ashcroft, Bob Dylan, Black Sabbat, Orbital, BT, Carmen Rizzio, VAS, Niyaz, Dead Can Dance, Omnia, Faun, Enya, Beethoven, Mozart, and random 80īs pop music, i liked Heart a lot. BARRACUDA!
I do play Videogames yes. Silent Hill, Resident Evil, and old school games like Metroid, Castlevania, Gradius, Lords of Thunder, Metal Gear, Ice Wind Dale, Baldurs Gate, Star Fox, CONTRA! Bwuahaha and fighting games....but itīs been a while since i played something i like.
Religion: i still donīt know i donīt really believe in religions at all but iīm a very spiritual person. I take Yoga seriously, meditation but i also go around making weird stuff with flowers and bones and sticks or hug trees or sometimes i pray to Mary, and think about pretty things and wish everyone the best, i respect peopleīs choices but i do not support violence in any form unless you get violent with Rock and Roll YEAH!
No Drugs for me, i donīt drink, used to smoke pot to relax, it was kinda fun, but that is in the past. Music is my drug. I donīt eat cadavers of animals, but sometimes i give it a bite just for the taste but get sick most of the times.
I simply looooooooove food, I love food! yum!
About my past:
A few relationships, a couple very serious.
I married my best friend. I broke a couple of hearts and mine was broken since i have memory. Only girl in a band of kids, cousins, brothers and i was the youngest so i had to fight for a place, kick, bite, scream, crawl, claw, run, hide. I used to play with cars, wooden swords, climbed trees, had a few barbie dolls i later hated for being so skinny and ride my bicycle until someone stole it. and i loved to spend the vacations swimming in the little swimming pool my parents made, from 7 am to 6 pm nonstop. Used to go watch my mom fly with a hang glider and watch my dad play bass and saxophone and get sad because he had a few bands and then got frustrated when he had to stop the music and get a job. Then they had a terrible divorce and my dad tormented us until i was about 18-19 years old. Now he is cool and old. Mom is an artist.
yes iīm VERY into fantasy, iīm a sensible person. i love rain and sad songs and i made some calculations and i think iīve listened to Billy Corganīs To Love Somebody more than a thousand times this month. Iīm obssssesseddddddddd with music.
Tah Daaaaah!
this was a pre 30īs crisis or something....